Girls bathroom
by Watch It Rain
Summary: It's good ol' high school days,and Shinra always managed to bring up Izaya's...feminine appearance. While Izaya never really thought anything of it this little "stunt" could put a major dent in his pride for quit awhile. WARNING(S):.. ahhh Izaya forced into wearing lip gloss? (Google image) 2-shot (T for safety net)


**I don't own Durarara**

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Izaya's POV

That's it! Shinra's nagging voice is a little bit too much to take at the moment, even for me.

He was worried about my injures... once again. Sure the fact that my humans cared for me was great and all, But telling me to stop my fun game of chase? Well now he was just nuts!

"I really think you should stop blah blah blah he wasn't even trying, and you still got hurt blah, blah blah!"

I shrugged "Well he IS a monster, if you would ever listen to me"

"If he's the monster stop throwing yourself at him and provoking him!" Shinra exclaimed a bit frustrated.

"Who's side are you on anyway" I asked sarcastically "Besides who's the one paying you right now?" It was a rhetorical question one that _obviously _ DID NOT need an answer but Shinra,being Shinra, gave me one.

"Well you.. BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT!" *sigh* will he ever learn.

"yes I know" I said calmly, pointing to my recently torn up arm "No jumping, Falling, writing, or typing..." I had this injury more than enough to predict the medical mess that was bound to wizz out of Shinra's mouth.

"Oh and-"

"Take one green pill instead of two" I interrupted " I know!,I know!"

He seemed a bit relieved,

"ok well you're good enough to go back to work, just... lay off the parkour for another week or so"

"FINALLY!" I exclaimed "I thought you'd let me go sooner! seems like I interrupting you and Celty's 'sexy time~" I smirked at him.

"yup!" he blushed "you're more then ok to leave" He said while pushing me out the door of the shared apartment.

"Bye Shinra~!"

~.~.~.~. Next day!~.~.~.~.

I woke up the next day unsurprisingly regretting my"stunt" ,As Shinra called it, That I pulled on Shizu-chan that really didn't work out that great for me. In the long run. BUT I did find out just how far the protozoan would go to find me...

(the story is a flash back to the events that took place the day before)

-beep-beep-beep-beep- *click*

'ahh to bright' I thought rolling my zombie like body out of the warm nest , referred to by most as a bed."soo bright, so cold" I groaned shielding my eyes from the early morning sun. ahh but wait that's not the best part... attached to my closet door hung a note.

_Orihara,_

_I'm off today, _

_remember to turn on the heat._

_I'm not paid enough to be a secretary, let alone a mortician._

_-Namie_

As if the cold had been held in a dame, and all courtesy to wait having been diminished, I felt an overwhelming wave of cold air hit my already lifeless body. I dived into the warm covers, throwing them over my head. IT WAS SOOO COLD. 'probably Namie's plan to finally rid me from this world, poison just isn't her thing. to subtle, she'd much rather I freeze to death. A beautiful blue corps.'

I didn't have long to stay under the toasty covers, my brain had started its daily scream.

**caffeine! Caffeine! CAFFEINE!**

I didn't know why I had such a human urge, But because I hate chocolate that left me with coffee to fulfill my need. Soon my body was on override , and despite the cold I got up to make myself some coffee. After preparing a hot cup of coffee I looked out my large office window, "ahh what mayhem to start today, I wonder" I asked myself sarcastically. I knew exactly what to do today, for once.

Yes, I had been planning this for a while, It's a wonder I hadn't gone insane. It's amusing how one well placed comment yesterday from Shinra would give me ideas in the future to annoy Shizu-chan. I still can't believe that I remembered what Shinra had one told me, I drone him out at recorded speed to begin with. He just isn't that interesting,but none the less I some how remember. We were studying in the library reading through the huge tower of books we were assigned, we were each on separate sides of the thin row in between the bookshelves.

_"Izaya?" Shinra had asked_

_"whaaaat~ I'm busy leave a message after the beep, BEEP!"_

_"you look very...Feminine..." It had come totally out of the blue, so I laughed and asked_

_" Is that supposed to be a compliment?"_

"just a statement" he replied before turning back to his reading. I chuckled before doing the same

It had been very funny at the time, but it was going to be even better now. I had it all planned out: It seemed that Shizuo stopped chasing me only when;

A) He would hurt someone else

OR

B) Someone stepped between us (Simon, Celty)

But today I would see if their was a third way... C) Running into a girl's bathroom.

If I was as _feminine_ looking as Shinra said, this should work. So after thinking about it one last time I grabbed my coat and wallet.

To get Shizu-chan's attention I will wear my usual coat but the longer, or as he would call it 'the hooker' version.'Now' I thought 'All I need is a black tank top, different shoes, and skinnier pants.'Is it possible to get them any more skinnier?' I laughed 'ya maybe I should just use these pants, any skinnier and I won't be able to run' I grabbed said listed items and went to check out. I put on a cold face while checking out, laughing on the inside from the strange face the cashier was giving me. "sisters' birthday" I replied casually. Making an 'Ohhh' face the cashier went back to the job he was payed to be doing.

After checking out and heading onto the streets I went over my plan one more time. A) Lure Shizu-chan into an enclosed building. _Normally,_ That would be suicide. But as I said I have a plan! B) annnnnd Run into the girls bathroom! I laughed, already this was too good! Because unless Shizu-chan decided to wear lipsticks, heels, and lace that day,I laughed, He was kinda screwed.

I was about to walk into a bathroom to change when a hitch in my plane became evident; Walk in as a guy, and come out as a girl...ya that wasn't going to work. Well guess I will have to change at the apartment. I lazily mad my way to the Shinjuku district,and walked into my apartment. I started changing as soon as I shut the door, cant waist anytime, its not like anyone is here anyway. I was slipping the shirt over my head when I heard a cough from behind me. I turned my head to look over my shoulder pulling the shirt the rest of the way down over my stomach. "Namie may I ask why your in my apartment on a Saturday?" Then I added "Should I be changing my locks on a weekly bases again?, Because If you can get in, anybody could" I joked.

This couldn't have been the worst thing she caught me doing, but the look in her eyes said otherwise.

"Do you always change by the door?" she asked with a scoff.

"Only when I'm in a hurry" I pinched the fabric on the thigh of my jeans jokingly before saying "Namie~ turn around you perv. I'm changing my pants" Total lie but even I get intimidated by her when she gives you that 'I can see right through you' stare. I laced up my boots before I (attempted) standing and grabbed my longer coat. "ok done" she turned around raising one eyebrow at my outfit, and the other at my coat.

"you haven't worn that in ages, it smells" She was right but it did not matter

"It's cold outside" I replied casually, making my way towards the door.

"It's 82 degrees"

"cold heart, cold blood Namie" I said quickly before shutting the door behind me.


End file.
